Genesis
by Niu Shiy-Ue
Summary: A prequel to my fic 'Halloween' on MM.org. Incest, shota, SetoxMokuba. Oh, and if anyone could think of a better title, I'm open to suggestions.


Title: Genesis 1/1

Author: Niu Shiy-Ue

Disclaimer: 'Yu-Gi-Oh' isn't mine, I just like to kidnap the characters.

Rating: R

Archive: , maybe if they ever get fixed again. Anyone else want it, just give me credit.

Category: Stuff. Okay, seriously, drama, romance and some angst.

Warnings: Yaoi, incest, shota, masturbation, oral. And, ahem, cutting. Okay, I know this is no place for a rant but for any really stupid people out there who use fanfics as guides to real life, cutting is NOT a good way to cope with your problems. I can personally vouch that it will NOT help things. If you ever get to the point to feeling the need to injure yourself, SEEK HELP! Sorry, to all you people who obviously have enough common sense not to need this warning, but I felt it had to be said.

Pairings: SetoxOFC, SetoxSeto, SetoMokuba

OCs: Some minor, but none of them get names anyway.

Spoilers: Small ones, for the first season, the Noa arc and one major one for the AE arc.

Summary: Okay this was supposed to be a PWP sequel to 'Halloween' using M-chan's ballgown pic. But it turned out to be a very long prequel with a plot and no sex at all. I apologize to all of you who were hoping otherwise. Anyway this takes place about six months to a year after 'Yu-Gi-Oh' and about two years before 'Halloween' and chronicles the start of Seto and Mokuba's relationship.

Oh, and I'm using the WB version of the RPG arc. For some reason, I find it infinitely less disturbing to believe that Seto programmed a female version of his little brother to be rescued in the game than having some scary 50 buisness man do it.

"You want me to wear WHAT?"

Seto continued typing, not even looking up at his brother's outburst. "I thought I was quite clear, perhaps we need to have your hearing checked."

Mokuba waved off the sarcasm. "I heard you fine the first time. But why?"

"It's to promote the new VR game in the US." Mokuba waited, but his brother didn't continue. "I'm gonna call a modeling agency."

"Did that. They didn't have anyone."

"What about the advertising companies? Surely they have some child models." Seto reached into his desk and handed a folder to Mokuba. He paged through it for a minute before finally exclaiming, "Ah-hah! Here's one!"

"I've already called her."

"So why do I need to go? I already got enough trouble from the stupid picture on the cover!"

"She's a bitch. If I had to spend three days with her, I'd be brought up on charges of infanticide. Besides, she doesn't speak English and _someone_ needs to be able to answer questions from the fans without snapping. And it's not as if anyone will know you; people in Japan barely know you exist, let alone in America."

"It's not fair!"

"Life isn't fair."

"Why don't you have to wear a costume?"

"I am." He pointed to the closed door where a blue suit hung. "I'm dressing as the Witty Phantom."

"So you get to wear an everyday buisness suit, and I have to wear a frou-frou dress! I don't even look like a girl!" Seto finally looked up at his brother. "What's wrong with the dress?"

"It has pink ruffles!"

"That's what Princess Adina wears in the game."

"I wore that dress in the game. And it looks horrible. Please, please anything else!" The CEO considered for a while. "I suppose it doesn't really matter, as long as you are in a gown. I'll call some tailors-"

"NO!" Seto was nonplussed at his brother's denial. "It's bad enough I have to wear girl's clothes, having them custom-made would be even worse. Can't I just go to the mall or something?"

"By yourself?!?"

"No, I'll take-I'll take Shizuka when I go."

"And two bodyguards." Mokuba made a face. "Niisamaaa . . . "

"Two bodyguards. Or I will call those tailors and make you wear white lace flowers with pink ruffles and sequins." Mokuba looked downcast, but Seto remained adamant. "I guess so. I'll call Shizuka."

"I'm glad we cleared that up. The two of you can go tomorrow."

Mokuba was the late sleeper of the Kaiba brothers. Usually, he wouldn't even wake up until his brother had left for work, which meant the only time he really got to see Seto was at night, during or after supper. But this morning he had been awake for an hour already and the sun had barely risen above the horizon. 'Damn dream' he thought to himself.

Ever since the Noa fiasco, Seto and Mokuba had shared the same bed. It had been a childhood habit, a form of reassurance, chasing away each others nightmares. And Kami-sama, they both had more than enough to last a lifetime. Today they weren't sleeping particularly close to each other, the only contact between them was Seto's arm around his waist.

Mokuba felt his brother stirring behind him and felt a brief flash of jealousy for Seto's internal clock. The older boy never needed an alarm clock; he could just tell himself to wake-up at whatever time he wanted. Although Seto still didn't reach out to touch him, he felt his brother's breath stir the hair on the back of his neck and he shivered. "Good morning, Mokuba."

"Morning, Niisama. Did you sleep well?"

"Yeah. I always sleep well when you're here. And you?" A kiss on the top of his head, but Mokuba still didn't turn around. He didn't want those penetrating eyes to discover his secret. "I, uh, well . . . " It would have helped to be good at lying, he thought angrily to himself.

"A nightmare? What was it about?"

"It was dark and, and something was chasing me. I kept trying to run away, but no matter how fast I ran, it was still gaining on me." There, that was one he had had often enough as a child. Hopefully, Seto would believe him.

"Hmm. Well I'll always be here to protect you." He could feel the other stretching, even though they still weren't touching each other. "You know that, right?"

"Hai, Niisama." Mokuba allowed a few seconds to pass before speaking again. "Niisama?"

"Yes Mokuba?"

"Don't you think" he hesitated, but it had to be done. "Don't you think I'm getting a little too old for this?"

"Too old for what?"

"Too old . . . too old to be sleeping with you like this. Maybe I should start staying in my own room now." The arm around his waist tightened and he was drawn back into a hard chest. Mokuba resisted the urge to squirm and tried to make his voice as light and frivolous as possible. "After all, what am I gonna do when you start dating? Turn into an insomniac?"

"I don't think we'll ever have to worry about that." He could feel his older brother's breath tickle his black hair and Seto's low voice rumble through his chest. "Besides, you just had another nightmare-"

"Yeah, but I should start learning to be independant, shouldn't I?" Get away from the nightmare, he chanted mentally.

"If you're sure . . . "

"Hai" Suddenly uncertain he wiggled around until he could look at his brother's face. "But . . . could you tuck me in at night?" Something dark lay within those blue eyes, but it melted away into the usual concern and love he was used to. "Of course Mokuba. And you can come and sleep with me whenever you want, just in case those nightmares come back, deal?"

"Deal."

"Why do you need me again?"

"I need to pick a dress."

"And why do you need to get a dress in the first place?"

"Because Niisama's dragging me to America to promote that stupid VRPG game and I have to dress up as Princess Adina."

"So why don't you just wear her outfit, like any normal otaku?"

"Because there's no way on earth that I'm gonna wear pink ruffles!" This last line was shouted and attracted quite a bit of attention. Mokuba blushed and wished he could just disappear into the ground. And there were some kids he recognized from class here, boy was he in for it . . .

"Okay, okay, I was just checking. Here, why don't we try this store first?" Mokuba didn't even bother to glance at the name, the sooner this was over, the better.

"Here's one!" Was it just him, or was Shizuka taking far too much pleasure at the thought of getting him into a dress? The one in question had a shiny gold bodice with black spaghetti straps and sheath skirt. "Shizuka-chan!"

"What's wrong with it?"

"The point is for people to think I'm a girl, it's gonna be easy to tell I'm not in that thing. Besides, I hate the color."

"Well let's take it with us anyway. We can always decide later." With that Shizuka dumped the dress onto a surprised Isono. "Hold that please." Then she reached for the next rack.

"This one would be perfect for you!" This 'perfect' dress was a blue silk sheath with black lace overlay embroidered with flowers, the mesh turning the bright blue into a darker steely color.

"No."

"Why not?"

"It's got lace flowers. And the color reminds me of Niisama." Shizuka lowered the dress, looking shocked. "How is that a bad thing?"

"I love Niisama. But I'm not too happy about being dragged to America and dressed up as a girl just because Niisama wants to make even more money off that stupid game."

"I guess that makes sense. But let's keep it anyway, it would really bring out the blue highlights in your hair and eyes." Was this a shopping trip to find a dress for him or something for Shizuka?

"Hi guys!"

"Oooh nooo"

"Er, Mokuba-kun?" Yuugi looked at the drooping Kaiba brother with a confused expression.

"Oh hi Yuugi! Don't worry about him, he's just a little embarrased about-"

"Shizuka. Shut. Up."

"What are you two doing here?"

"Like I was saying, we're buying dresses." At this point Mokuba was beginning to wonder if someone really could die of shame.

"Oh, Mokuba-kun agreed to go shopping with you?"

"No, he's the one who needs the dress." Forget it, he'd just hang himself on one of those scary strap things that were on the rack nearby.

"Why?" Mokuba covered his ears as Shizuka began to tell Yuugi all the juicy details. After today, Isono really deserved a raise, he thought.

"Well let me help." With that, Yuugi dashed into the aisles. When he came back, he had possibly the most terrifying thing any of them (Shizuka, Mokuba and bodyguards, who had dealt with an angry, Mokuba-less Kaiba during Battle City) had ever seen.

"Well, at least it's not leather." said Shizuka adding it to the other two that Isono already held.

"No, it just happens to be made completely out of silver buckles attached to straps of black fabric." replied a very dubious Mokuba.

"Let's pick up two more and then try them on." The last two were in the ballgown section, one chosen by Yuugi and one chosen by Shizuka. By this point Mokuba had resigned himself to his fate and waited for them by the dressing rooms with the other bodyguard.

"Heehee! Free fashion show!" Yes Shizuka was way too into this. And did she have to drag Yuugi into it too?!? Although he seemed just as, if not more excited than Shizuka about getting to see the younger Kaiba humiliate himself.

The first up was the black with the gold bodice. "I guess not. That color really makes you look sallow, almost jaundiced. And you really have no chest." Yuugi.

Then the blue one. "Well I like it, if we can't find anything else, I say we come back for this one." Shizuka.

Next the one Yuugi chose. It was slightly more substantial than it looked, heavy black velvet, keyhole top with no back and a short skirt with indecently high slits. Silver buckles on straps held it closed at the neck and two more at the waist. "I think Kaiba-sama would have a heart attack if you wore that. And then he would kill all of us." That was from Isono.

He didn't bother modeling the ballgown that Shizuka had chosen, "This is pink! I'm not wearing pink!"

Which finally left the last one. "Perfect!" said Shizuka.

"I agree, Kawai-san."

"You can make that unanimous." added Yuugi.

"Does this mean we can go home now?"

"Nope! Now we have to buy you accessories!"

"Isono, where is Mokuba? I told him this morning to be here at 2 PM."

"Kaiba-sama, Mokuba-sama wanted to spend some time wandering around. He said he'd change and meet you at the stage." Seto cursed softly under his breath then adjusted the collar of his costume. Although the suit was an exact replica of what was shown in the card, he hadn't bothered to dye his hair or put in any contacts. He had a feeling the cosplayers were going to be disappointed, not that he cared.

He ran down the steps and quickly made his way to the "backstage" area set up by the conventioneers. When he checked his watch, he found that he had less than five minutes before the interview started. Where was Mokuba?

"Made it just in time!" Seto turned around, about to start chastising Mokuba for his tardiness, but the words caught in his throat. It was a deep violet ballgown, with petticoats that swept the floor, a split skirt and bustle. Long gloves of the same color came up above Mokuba's elbows and he held a blue lace fan. He had actually applied some make-up too, deep burgandy lip gloss and pale blue eye-shadow, which highlighted his features. The crowning touch was the three peacock-colored ornaments that pinned his dark hair up. A few wild stands tumbled loose from the pins and curled around the high neck of the dress.

"Wh-what's, ahem, what the hell is that on your face?" Seto reached out and brushed a few stray curls back from his brother's pale face.

"Shizuka's idea. She said no one would ever think I'm a boy if I wore cosmetics." He fluttered the fan a little. "She even made me practice with the fan and high heels."

'She did an excellent job' Seto thought to himself. "Let's go."

"Isono, why couldn't Niisama have hired a cosplayer to go with him? There were plenty out there who looked more like Adina than I do and knew just as much, if not more about the game than I did. He could have saved me the humiliation of wearing that thing." Mokuba pointed to the purple fabric that had been rewrapped in plastic and hung over the back of his chair.

"Do you really think Kaiba-sama would have tolerated living with another person for three days?"

"No, I suppose not. I thought he was gonna bite off that girl's head, the one who asked if he'd marry her." Mokuba finished buttoning up his green PJs, then checked his face in the mirror. "I thought I'd never get that stuff off my face. Glad I'll never have to do that again. Isono, do you think my brother's done with his work?"

"Kaiba-sama is always busy. But I'm sure he won't mind you."

"Okay" With that, Mokuba raced down the hall to his brother's room. Kaiba, with typical extravagance had reserved an entire corridor of the hotel. Not only did Mokuba get his own room, but Seto used another for his office and several of their bodyguards got their own rooms too.

When he got there, he noticed his brother's door was half open, even though the lights were out. Wondering if something was wrong, he stopped to listen. He didn't hear any yelling or typing or the even the soft wshk-wshk of paper shuffling. He did hear heavy breathing however; was his brother ill? Was his brother crying? Now more than a little worried, Mokuba silently pushed the door open.

His brother wasn't ill, although for a second Mokuba had thought the closed eyes, flushed skin and beading sweat meant a fever. Then his gaze traveled lower. And then he ran out of the room.

Isono looked up as he rushed back in. "Mokuba-sama, is something wrong? Did Kaiba-sama yell at you?" He shook his head. "N-no, ah, he didn't even notice I-I'd come in."

"Mokuba-sama your brother is a very busy person and-"

"No!" Mokuba blushed and tried to hide behind his hair. "Um, there was, uh, he was, ah, he was with someone. One of the cosplayers."

"Oh, I see." Isono did see, this hadn't been the first time something like this had happened. He wished his employer had been a little more discreet though. And he really did not want to be having this conversation. "Well, Mokuba-sama, when people grow older they have certain needs and-"

"STOP!" Mokuba blushed even harder, then took a deep breath to calm himself. "We, ah, we already had the sex talk in school. I know what they were doing."

"Oh. Good. So, ummmm . . . " Mokuba started rummaging through his bags. "I don't even want to think about it. Isono, could you play a game with me. I don't think I could sleep with that image in my head."

"Of course Mokuba-sama."

Seto glared at the sniveling girl on the bed. This hadn't been his first one night stand, but they usually had more dignity than this thing. "Bastard" she hissed. Then, "Kisama." He ignored her and searched around for some clothes. The shirt was a complete wreck, but the pants were almost intact. He pulled them on then opened the door. Isono was waiting outside, as dutiful as ever. "Get rid of her" he ordered.

"Of course, Kaiba-sama." He didn't bother to look behind him but continued down the hall. "Is my brother asleep already?"

"Yes, sir. He fell asleep" Isono checked his watch. "-two and a half hours ago."

That barely slowed him down. He opened the door to his brother's room, quickly spotting the figure on the bed. He didn't want to wake him, but he did feel guilty about breaking another promise. Seto leaned over Mokuba and softly kissed his temple. "I'll make this up to you. I promise." He then lay back and wrapped around his little brother. If he hadn't tucked Mokuba in, at least he could be there when he woke up.

Mokuba stared disconsolately at the morning newspaper. It had been two weeks since they had returned from America and things were back to normal, well, at least as normal as things could ever be in the Kaiba household. Which means there was a less than subtle air of depression around the house. The only difference was that this time the center of the storm was the younger Kaiba brother.

Ever since they had gotten back, he just could not stop thinking about what he had seen. At the time he had felt shocked and embarrassed, but as time went on, the numbness had worn off. He found himself feeling sad and hurt and he didn't know why. And it got worse, jealousy and betrayal and just a cold, empty ache in the middle of his chest that wouldn't go away. And he kept having dreams, just like the dream from before the trip. They scared him, yet at the same time they were so good when they happened . . . he didn't know what to think. And the photo session . . . and finally the picture on the newspaper. He recognized the woman, had seen her two days ago at the party that was being featured. But he hadn't seen what had been photographed and printed on the front page. "Good morning, Mokuba."

"Morning Niisama." He hoped the depression in his voice passed for sleepiness. He didn't want to have to explain what he was feeling to his brother when he didn't understand it himself. He needed to talk to someone about this.

Luck was on his side. "Anything special happening at school today?"

"No, well, maybe." Seto's eyebrow shot up and he looked at him over the rim of his coffee cup. "I was thinking of stopping by Yuugi's this afternoon."

"Why on earth would you want to hang around him?"

"It's not Yuugi I want to see. I-" Think fast Mokuba, he told himself. "I wanted to see what new games have come out."

"Why? I could just buy them for you."

"Yeah, but then how would I know which ones I would like? Or hate?"

"So you're getting Mutou's opinon on them?"

"Yuugi's, his grandfather's, whoever else happens to be there at the time."

"Fine" His brother's acceptance seemed a bit abrupt, but Mokuba wasn't going to question his good fortune. "Just remember that whatever that mutt tells you is wrong. And if Mutou mentions anything about magic or reincarnations or the 'Heart of the Cards' that's wrong too."

"Okay Niisama. And thanks."

Mokuba shrugged off his backpack and smiled at Yuugi's grandfather. Even though the old man loathed Seto with an intense passion, he actually liked Mokuba, and went out of his way to help him. Of course, he had also informed Mokuba that if Seto ever showed up at the shop without him, he'd cheerfully blow his head off, but Mokuba thought he was just playing around with him. He hoped.

Unfortunately, that bias meant that Ojiisan was probably the last person he should talk to about these feelings. While Mokuba certainly had no compunction against lying outright about these things, the old man was a lot sharper than he looked. And hearing a rant about every real and imagined fault in his brother wouldn't really help. So who should he ask?

He entered the back and looked around. As luck would have it, everyone was here today, even Ryou, Shizuka and Otogi. He crossed out Honda and Jounouchi first, he didn't think either of them would even have the slightest clue on how to help him. Otogi, he didn't feel he knew well enough, even though because of buisness meetings he probably saw more of the Black Crown owner than all of the others put together. Ryou, maybe, but Mokuba didn't really feel all that comfortable asking someone who had once kidnapped him and wanted his body. Even if it had been the Spirit of the Millenium Ring and not Ryou himself, they had looked too much alike for him to dismiss what had happened easily. He could probably talk to Yuugi, heck he could probably tell Yuugi the whole truth and not have to worry about being screamed at, but he rather doubted Yuugi had any good advice. For the past two years Yuugi's closest relationship had been with a spirit who could read his mind, and it might have just been Mokuba, but he expected that would skew anyone's perspective. So that left Shizuka and Anzu.

He glanced between the two of them, then tapped Anzu on the shoulder. "Hi, Mokuba! I didn't know you were coming today."

"It was a spur-of-the-moment thing. Anzu, can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Sure Mokuba."

"In private."

"Everyone's too caught up in the game between Ryou and Yuugi so I doubt they'd notice if a bomb went off right now. But if you like, let's go into the kitchen." They entered and shut the door behind them. "Now what's this all about?"

"Anzu . . . I have a friend who thinks she's in love. How can you tell if it's real or not?"

"At least it wasn't 'Where do babies come from?' I don't think I could handle that, not to mention your brother would kill me. Slowly. It's hard to say. First of all, there are many different types of love: paternal, platonic, romantic, cougheroticcough. To make things more difficult, love is different for everyone. What's the situation with your friend?"

"There's this guy she knows, he's older than her. She's known him for a really long time, but recently she's started having dreams about him. And . . . whenever she sees him with someone else, she feels pain."

"Pain?"

"Jealousy maybe. She feels like he's betrayed her and she doesn't understand why she feels that way."

"What else? Tell me more."

"They're very close. He's always protected her and she's always supported him. But she's fairly sure he doesn't feel the same way about her."

"It could be love. It could also be infatuation."

"What should she do? Ahh, this isn't necessarily an accepted relationship."

"Wait and see. Spend time together, see if these feelings grow stronger. It may just be a crush now, but it could grow stronger. Look at Mai and Jounouchi."

"Oh, well, that wasn't very helpful."

"I'm sorry about that, but that's the best I can offer. I'd say she should tell him about her feelings, but she seems pretty certain it's unreciprocated. Maybe time will bring them closer, but there's nothing else I can think of."

"Nothing?"

"Until someone figures out a fool-proof way to fall out of love, I guess we're all in the same boat. Do you want to go back now? I think Ryou and Yuugi are ready to play something else."

"Uhuh. I guess so."

"Incidently, Mokuba does you're brother know you're gay?" He stopped, just moments away from opening the door. He whirled back to look at her, suddenly breathless with fear.

"N-no. How did you know it was about me?"

"'My friend has a problem' must be the oldest trick in the book. You should tell him soon. And don't worry, we'll support you. After all, Yuugi's gay, and we're still friends with him."

"Err, thank you Anzu."

"You're welcome. If you ever feel the need to talk, feel free to call."

"Mokuba is something wrong? You've been quiet all evening." Mokuba winced then looked up at his brother. He had been hoping Seto would be too absorbed in his work to notice, but now he needed to think of something to say. He didn't want to tell Seto about his conversation with Anzu; it would raise too many questions that he wasn't prepared to answer.

"I have a test coming up."

"Worried about it? Do you need some help?"

"Not really. More generalized worrying." His brother gave him a worried glance then stood up and walked over to him. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Mokuba turned away from his brother to look at his plate. "I just worry about the future sometimes. What am I going to do when I grow up? What if something-" Seto's arms wrapped around him and he was pulled from his chair into his brother's lap. "You worry too much." (1)

Mokuba relaxed into his brother's embrace, pulling strength from it. "I'll always protect you. I promise."

"I know Niisama. I trust you."

Seto closed and locked the door to his room. Mokuba was still awake, but had already finished his homework. He had told Mokuba not to disturb him, so the brothers wouldn't see each other again until bedtime.

He walked over to his closet and opened it. From within he took out the dress Mokuba had been wearing at the convention and held it up to his face. Even though Mokuba had only worn it once and it had already been cleaned, he almost thought he could still smell his brother's musk on it.

He leaned back on his bed, clutching the dress to himself. His mind went back, to the convention. The VRPG had been more popular than he had thought, thanks in part to pirated copies of the Big Five's control program. Although not happy, he had been less offended than others might expect, after all, it wasn't as if they had stolen the codes he himself had made. And maybe the extra interest would turn into additional revenue when he released the sequel. The curent platform was far too small to support the creation costs. Currently, only a few major parks (such as Kaibaland) had the VR pods; he needed to create something that was available to a wider audience.

If the convention had been bad, the presentation had been worse. Half of the questions he had been asked had nothing to do with the game, a significant minority had been about his private life. And later, there had been a photo session, something his PR department hadn't warned him about; someone's head was going to roll for that. However one good thing had come out of it. The last pose in the free photo shoot had been a request of one of the fans in the audience, to see the 'Princess' and the 'Witty Phantom' kissing (some odd fanficcer, no doubt). Of course, they couldn't refuse, not without exposing Mokuba's identity.

It had felt odd at the time. They weren't a touchy-feely family, rarely even hugged (unless of course it was just after a kidnapping attempt) so positioning was a bit awkward at first. Finally, he had pulled Mokuba onto his lap, leaned down and kissed him. The kiss had been light and chaste at first. Then Mokuba had reached up to steady himself, soft-gloved hands caressing his cheeks. And Seto had just melted into it, pulling his brother tight against him, pressing harder down on the soft lips beneath his. One of his hands had slid up to rest on the back of Mokuba's neck while his tongue plundered the younger boy's lipsticked mouth. It had been so incredibly sweet, he barely stopped himself from going further.

From a casual search through the Internet, that had been the most popular pose of the day. His PR department had been ecstatic.

That's where his fantasy started, his heart already pounding from the memory. Reaching up to undo the pins in Mokuba's dark hair and stoking down his back. Sucking on that moist lip, before kissing him so deeply he could steal his breath away. He lifted his hand, picturing those hesitant, gloved fingers tracing over the lines of his face. Then downward, pushing off the jacket of the purple(?) suit, warm air breezing across his clavicle.

Seto squirmed, too hot in his clothes. Trembling, long-fingered hands quickly undid small buttons and he took off his own shirt, discarding it somewhere away from the bed. He raised the red fabric to his face again and rubbed it across his cheek. It whispered across his bare skin, causing his nipples to peak and his groin start throbbing painfully.

He imagined sliding his hand down the fabric, then hiking it up again to expose soft, milky skin. Small hands exploring his chest, rubbing lightly over his aureoles. Unable to control himself anymore, one hand slipped down his own body stroking himelf through his pants. In his mind, Seto was arching up into the clumsy stokings of inexperienced hands, trying to stifle back whimpers of desire.

Glacier blue eyes slid shut, the images behind them growing ever more vivid. He could see those flushed cheeks, that shy, quick glance. He raised one hand to push back luxurious hair, wanting, needing to see the passion growing in those beloved eyes. Pressing kisses to that white skin, tongue just tasting the sweat that had beaded there.

He lost himself within his brother, within the other's body. Hiding away in those thick clouds of hair, losing his moans in that perfumed skin. Completely submerged in his dream, he thrust up into his hand. His fantasies never lasted long. Too wound up by lust, too needy for his brother or perhaps something else, he quickly lost himself in that white eternity of his release. He arched off the bed then fell back, limp with exhaustion. He spent a few minutes relaxing afterwards, before forcing himself to sit up. A quick glance of the clock revealed he had just enough time to clean himself up, before Mokuba would be knocking on his door, waiting for his big brother to tuck him in.

Mokuba heard the door slam and looked away from the TV. Over the past week Seto had been coming home very late, to the point that Mokuba had barely even seen him. Mokuba had decided to take advantage of the weekend and stay up late to greet his brother. From the sounds of things, his brother could use some cheering up. "Hi Niisama!"

Seto froze in the process of taking off his shoes. "Mokuba, what are you doing up? It's past midnight."

"It's the weekend, Niisama. It's not like I have school in the morning. Where have you been all week?" Seto discarded his trench coat and briefcase haphazardly, dropping into the sofa next to his brother with a sigh. "The PR department is on a campaign to make me more 'user-friendly'."

"User-friendly?"

"Apparently, in order to improve Kaiba Corp's international standing, I have to act like all those do-gooder twits at school. This past week I've endured charity drives, school sports matches, opening ceremonies and-" He shuddered. "Blind dates."

"I'm sorry Niisama."

"Don't be, it's hardly your fault."

"So you're gonna be busy next week too?"

"Yeah, why? Is something going on?"

"No, not really, it's just-" Mokuba cut himself off with a shake of his head. When he didn't continue, Seto took over the conversation. "It gets worse."

"How?"

"For the next month or so, PR is hosting a contest. 'Win a Date with Kaiba Seto' My choice between thirty screeching harpies. At least Mai's intelligent."

"Oh"

"She'd be tolerable. Too bad she's not participating."

"I thought she was going out with Jounouchi."

"The mutt? I'm sure she could do better than that. Anyway, after this stunt's over, I'm going to take a vacation." Glacier blue eyes closed and a slight smile twisted the corners of his lips upwards. Mokuba wasn't sure if it was the prospect of a future vacation that his brother was looking forward to, or that of firing half of Kaiba Corps PR department. Either way, he was sure it didn't bode well for someone. Then his mind went back over what had been said. "Niisama?"

"Yes, Mokuba?"

"What if . . . what if you like one of the women they chose for you?" That snapped the CEO's attention back to his younger brother immediately. "You're joking, right?"

"No, really. What if one of them was-" Mokuba searched his mind for qualities his brother admired. "-a really good duelist, beautiful and intelligent?"

"You really are serious! What's brought this about?" Already Mokuba's courage was evaporating, he just wanted to drop the subject. "Never mind, Niisama. Can you tuck me in now?"

That brought the smile back to Seto's face. "I knew you shouldn't have waited up for me. Come here." He stood up, then picked up the small boy. "I'm gonna miss this when you grow up." Mokuba snuggled into his brother's chest and allowed himself to be carried up the stairs.

Unfortunately that wasn't the end of it for Mokuba. Although he had easily feigned sleep to fool his brother into leaving him alone, the real thing was much more elusive. After tossing and turning for over two hours, he gave up trying. For some reason he just could not get the earlier conversation out of his head. Worries multiplied and echoed in his mind, whispering of disappointment and abandonment. What if his brother did find someone?

That was a good thing, right? Maybe Seto would relax a bit, stop spending so much time at work and start enjoying himself instead. Mokuba wouldn't have to worry so much about Seto; no more staying up at nights wondering if his brother would ever make it home to sleep. It would be nice to have a new friend, someone to commiserate about the CEO's workaholic habits. She would be someone Seto could connect with, someone who could help him work out his problems . . . someone other than his useless little brother.

Dammit! Mokuba pounded his pillow in frustration. He was trying to be happy for his brother, but all his thinking was just making the hole in his chest bigger. He was so selfish, all he could think of was his brother happily walking away from him! If that's what Seto wanted, then that was the way things were going to be and nothing he could do would change it. He'd seen it before, no matter how much Seto did love him, when Seto made up his mind nothing, not even Mokuba could stand in his way. Just look at what happened with the Death-T, with Yuugi, with that duel with Gonzaburo in Noa's world.

He was such a baby. He had always supported Seto, even when it wasn't returned. Was it too much to ask that he stay with him a little longer? He didn't want to have to leave yet. But maybe that's what Seto wanted, maybe that's why he had agreed to go through with this fiasco. Maybe Seto didn't want to be stuck with just him any more. "If I keep thinking like this" Mokuba muttered to himself, "I'm going to end up crying all night." He decided to get up and do something, maybe watch TV or read a book or anything to get his mind off his thoughts.

He spent maybe a half-hour watching some strange American movie, about a self-destructive schizophrenic genius. It didn't really help, it far too closely mirrored his brother's life and from the looks of things, was going to have an incredibly depressing finish. The young boy decided to go to the kitchen, he had always heard that warm milk helps people sleep.

However, he never got around to it. Instead, when Mokuba got there he was distracted by the knife rack under the cabinet where they kept the glasses. He had never been too keen on knives, they lacked both the grandeur of semi-automatics and the subtler sense of achievment that toxins gave him. On the other hand, he thought, they had a much better way of modulating the amount of damage they do. He looked at the meat cleaver, heavy and dull gray. There you have your massacres, your death and dismemberment. But there were also things like surgeons' scapels, small and precise. Even a needle could be considered a knife it you looked at it in the correct way. He took out one of the smaller paring blades. It didn't have the visual impact of the cleaver, but Mokuba had to admit it had it's own charm. Sharp and polished to almost mirror reflectivity; didn't they say even lasers could be used like blades?

He hesitated, then raised the small edge to his other wrist. He had heard about people doing this, had been warned not too. But what could it hurt? The blade was small, and as long as he didn't cut too deeply . . . besides, anything had to be better than what he was feeling now. Before he knew it there was a small red diagonal line in his skin.

It hurt. No question about it. But as he focused on the pain and the blood, everything inside seemed to diminish and become managable. And then the pain began to diminish. It didn't become numb or pleasurable, but rather like exercising, a good ache that said you had accomplished something. And everything inside just seemed to go away a little, become smaller and more managable. He rather liked that feeling.

He quickly washed the small wound under water, then wrapped his wrist in a paper towel. He returned the knife to it's spot, left, then came back. He found a small hand towel and wrapped it up and took it with him. If he wasn't going to be able to see Seto for the next month or so, he thought he might need to keep an edge in a handy place.

"Niisama what the HELL!?!"

"Kami-sama, I'm sorry Mokuba!" His brother was just a blurry purple and black blob through the steam and frosted glass of the shower door, but Mokuba didn't need to see Seto to know it was him. Who else would be so socially inept as to not to realize that it was rude to walk in on someone in the shower, even if that person was your brother? _Especially_ if that person was your brother! "Get out!"

"I said I was sorry Mokuba! It's not as if it's something I hadn't seen before!"

"I know! I don't care! Just leave!"

"Mokuba" The blob stopped, sighed, then restarted his sentence. "Mokuba, I think we need to talk."

"Not while I'm in the shower!"

"I used to bathe you when you were younger; never thought you'd grow up to be such a prude. Alright, I'll be back in about thirty, maybe forty minutes. If you don't want me to get an eyeful later, you'd better be dressed by the time I get here."

It might not have been the quickest shower in the history of mankind, but it certainly was the quickest the younger Kaiba had ever taken. He hadn't even bothered to comb his hair afterwards, tripping over the too long pants of his PJs and rolling back his sleeves on his way to his brother's room. Once there, he cautiously peeked in.

It hadn't changed. He didn't know why he was expecting it to have, but he hadn't been in his brother's room ever since they had stopped sleeping together, so it certainly felt different. He hugged his BEWD plushy tighter, feeling small and unsure again. He looked around and decided to wait on the bed for Seto.

The blue-eyed boy had been in the shower when Mokuba got there, he could hear the water running. Unfortunately, Seto didn't realize that Mokuba had come to him rather than waiting in his own room, so when he came out of his personal bathroom while drying his hair . . . let's just say he didn't believe in bathrobes. Mokuba shrieked and buried his head in the dark blue pillows. "NIISAMA!"

"Wha-Mokuba?"

"Put some clothes on!" Mokuba was sure he was as red as a tomato. It didn't help that he was sure his brother was laughing at him.

"You really are a prude!" Laughing his head off, definitely.

There was the soft sound of sliding cloth, then, "Alright Mokuba, you can look now, I'm dressed." Mokuba raised his head. Seto's idea of dressed varied. Out in public he was modest, long sleeves, spiky trench coats or formal suits. When he was alone with Mokuba he was much more relaxed. Relaxed to the point that when he meant dressed, he meant he had put on a pair of boxers. And nothing else. Mokuba downgraded from tomato, but not by much. "Niisama, what did you want to talk about?"

"You'll be glad to know we're done with the filming."

"So when will the show be on? Who did you finally choose?"

"Never. I came very close to strangling the winner when we were supposed to go on our 'date'. The people responsible for this decided that portrayal wouldn't be very helpful in softening my image." Seto reached out and pulled his brother into a hug. "So no more publicity stunts for the next two weeks or so while they rethink their strategy."

Mokuba beamed at him. "That's great!"

"I've missed you too. You know, if they really wanted to keep their jobs, they'd come up with something we could do together. It feels like we've been growing apart lately. I don't want that to happen." They spent the next few minutes just cuddling. "Now, why don't you go to bed and I'll tuck you in."

"Thanks, Niisama." Mokuba squirmed off the bed, but in the process, his sleeve got pushed a little too far up. "Mokuba!"

He looked at the other, confused about what had started the outburst. "Niisama? What's wrong?"

Seto grabbed his hand. Realizing what had happened, Mokuba tried to pull away, but his brother was too strong. "Mokuba, how did you get these wounds?"

"I-I fell." The CEO pushed back the green sleeves and glared. "This wasn't caused by a fall. And from the look of things this has been going on for quite some time." A pause. "Mokuba, how long have you been cutting yourself?"

There was no point in lying anymore, but Mokuba still looked away. He didn't want his brother to see him cry. "More than three months now." Seto quickly put two and two together. "Ever since . . . Mokuba, why didn't you tell me you were lonely? I would have stopped that damned-"

"Niisama, I have to grow up sometime."

"What does this have anything to do with growing up?!?"

"You don't" he started over. "You don't want my 'pathetic loser's gaze' following you all the time, do you?"

"Mokuba, please. This isn't about that incident."

"It's still true." Quieter. "It's even more true now."

"What do you mean by that?" Mokuba didn't want to answer. Didn't want to see that hate in his brother's eyes again. He struggled to get away, but this time Seto did more than stop him, rolling over till he had completely covered the younger's body with his own. Mokuba had no place to run. "Niisama, please. Let me go."

"No. Not until you tell me why you've been doing this to yourself."

"I love you." With that Mokuba leaned up and brushed his lips against his brother's then fell back and closed his eyes, all the fight gone out of him. If Seto decided to kill him now, he wasn't going to stop him.

"Is that all?"

"I think it's more than enough." For a while, they stayed that way, silent, older menacing younger, younger awaiting his fate. "Mokuba"

"Mokuba, I'm not going to do anything until you explain yourself."

"I love you Niisama."

"How?"

"More than I should."

"What do you mean by that?"

"I mean I want to be with you. Forever. Like" He swallowed. Tears were burning in his eyes but he refused to let them go. If he started crying now, he wouldn't be able to stop. "I want you. Like that girl I saw you with in California. I need you. I'm not ready to grow up and make my own life away from you and I don't think I'll ever be ready. I love you. Not just as a brother but-"

"As a lover." He felt his hands being released and his brother moving off of him. He tensed waiting for the blow, but it never came. Instead, lips gently traced the scars on his wrists. He opened his eyes. "Niisama?"

"I'm not going to hurt you Mokuba. I'm happy you feel that way."

"Y-you are?"

"Yes" Nimble fingers were undoing the buttons of his shirt, tracing his chest. Mokuba gasped in surprise, then unexpected pleasure. He reached up and placed uncertain hands on his brother's chest. Exploration continued until Seto was the one lying on his back, gasping and arching into small hands.

Mokuba wasn't entirely sure what to do. Sure, they had gone over this stuff in class, but he wasn't really ready for everything. He slipped his hands down to his brother's hips then hesistated. Clouded blue eyes stared at him, pleading for more. He made his decision then pulled off the blue boxers. For a moment he faltered, not exactly scared, more anticipatory.

Drops of fluid already beaded the tip. He licked at those, then slowly took his brother into his mouth. He wasn't able to go down very far, so he stroked the rest with small hands. He explored what he could with his tongue and swallowed a few times. He thought he might have been doing things wrong because Seto pulled him away so soon, but the resultant explosion surprised him. Perhaps his brother really had been looking forward to this. Mokuba tasted a bit of the fluid that had gotten on his hands. He wasn't sure how he felt about it, it didn't really taste all that bad, just salty. Maybe he'd get better at this in time.

Large hands sliding into his own PJs brought his attention back to the present. "A-ah, Niisama."

"It's only fair you get a turn after all."

"I don't think" Tugging gently before his brother got too into it. "I don't think I'm quite ready for that." He immediately hated himself for the guilty look that appeared on that pale face. "It's not your fault! I liked making you feel good!"

"I don't want to pressure you!"

"Your not. I just want to take things slow." The guilt didn't leave his brother's expression so he wrapped his arms around him and tried to hug it away. It seemed to work as Seto's long arms came up and returned the embrace. "I never even knew you felt like this before."

"I understand." They pulled away from each other. For a moment they looked into each others eyes then kissed passionately. Mokuba then got off the bed, picked up his plushy from where it had fallen and made his way out the door. "Goodnight Seto. I love you."

"Good night Mokuba. I love you too."

(1) Comes from 

Niu Shiy-Ue

ON THE TWELTH DAY OF BATTLE CITY IN SETO'S CLOSET YOU CAN FIND:

Twelve Mokie-sized dresses

Eleven copies of Noa

Ten videos of Yuugi

Nine Anzus dancing

Eight civil lawsuits

Seven Sennen Items

Six High Priests

THEEE BIIIG FIIIIIVE!!!

Four crazy Ishtars

Three trenchcoats

Two BEWD plushies

And a Pegasus head sans eeeyyyeee!!!

Only to be sung when very, very drunk. 


End file.
